Thursday, 13 March 2003

Thursday, March 13, 2003

The United States has designated over 355 BILLION DOLLARS for defense in the FY 2003 budget, and the P.R. mouthpieces over at BushCo are feigning outrage and forecasting doom because of this:

...a makeshift contraption with wooden propellers, duct-taped wings and a dinged-up fuselage. ...the black-and-white drone appeared to have been fashioned from cannibalized aviation parts and standard craft-shop fare. The body was built with a torpedo-shaped fuel tank from a larger plane. The wings were constructed with cloth-covered balsa wood. Patches of aluminum foil were used for reinforcement.

Folks, let's just be brutally frank about this: it's a fucking overgrown remote control model airplane--a frankenstein amalgamation of balsa wood, junked plane parts, and stuff they got down at the local Hobby Haven, and it's held together with duct tape! The only thing that seems to be missing is the plastic sheeting. Goddammit, where's Tom Ridge when you need him?!

Oh, but wait! The wingspan is 3 meters wider than initially reported. Oops, that's gonna leave a skidmark 'cause my buddy Colin says that "should be of concern to everybody."

That's it. That tore it. It's over. Those 3 meters cinched the deal for me. I now feel that my personal safety and security here in the southwest corner of America is clearly and presently threatened by this dangerous weapon of mass destruction. Let the bombs rain down! Onward Christian Soldiers...